25 lessons I learned from motherhood:
1. Never let a kid hold a tube of super glue, even for a second.
2. Even if they say they don't need to, ALWAYS take the kids to the potty before you leave to do errands.
3. Carry an extra set of clothes with you per kids, no matter how old they are.
4. If you are going out, be sure to check your bag for diapers!
5. Keep all sharpies out of your kids reach.
6. Mr. Clean Erasers are a god-send. Keep a nice stock of those.
7. It will take you "x" number of times longer (x equals the number of kids you have with you) to do an errand, such as "running" into Target or the grocery store, than it used to take you.
8. Walk away from temper tantrums, it's not worth your sanity.
9. Never start a "project" when the kids are up. You know you aren't going to get it accomplished!
10. All kids will eventually eat. Stop stressing out.
11. You will never have any privacy again.
12. You will constantly look "tired".
13. Messes will always just seem to "appear" out of thin air.
14. Your kids will 97% not eat that awesome new dish you found on Pinterest.
15. If you think your shaving razor is high, it's not high enough!!
16. You can never have enough wine or caffeinated drinks in the house.
17. It's best to tell a kid about an exciting thing you are doing or that will be happening exactly 2 minutes before it's about to happen.
18. No TV for the kiddies too close to bed, or else your bedtime visits will multiply exponentially.
19. It's not the best idea to take your kid's lovey out and about with you, especially in a place far from home.
20. You will never get a response from your kids the first time you ask.
21. A quiet child is most likely getting into trouble.
22. You can never have enough hand soap, toilet paper, paper towels, or concealer.
23. It's a good idea to keep a hidden stash of candy or stickers for bribing purposes.
24. Kids will always repeat what you say.
25. If you had a "not-your-best-mommy" day, you can always try again tomorrow. :)
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